It’s Called Babelfish

     Good evening and welcome to another episode of “Fanny and the Looking Glass”  Brought to you in part by Beneficial, Peeps, and Lever 2000- for all of your 2000 parts.  It has now been about 5 months since I last posted a blog and boy has it been something.  Well, I won’t say that the grass has been green, maybe a nice light brownish, gold, and muddy shade of yellow is more like it.  But we move on.  It has been rather crazy around here, and of course, I would rather be mum then to complain.  I think I have done enough complaining already.  For the most part, I have retracted from my family and friends, sheltering myself in a bubble where no one can hurt me any more.  Even sheltering myself from the hubby at times, just so I can breathe.  I started listening to some latin music for a while, and yes, I will continue to do so, but it all depends on my mood. 

     My hubby and cousin have come to the conclusion that I must be bi-polar since my moods change about as frequently as the setting and rising sun.  In the month of love, I changed my pic to a devilish woman with the song Atrevete playing in the background.  Yes, that is how I felt at that time, wanting to be the free spirited person that once roamed the halls of Academic HS.  However, once March stepped in, I reverted back to my normal ways, and found a great song too!  I have been listening to alot more christian rock and trying to keep my hopes as high as possible.  I know that me and the hubby can get through these trials and tribulations and I know that in the end we will succeed and will be better than before.  My patience may wear thin, but my perserverance drives me forward.  Otherwise, life is pretty much the same, with the exception of new friends, and a stronger will to be connected to my sister-in-law.  I know that at first we just didnt get along, but I can bury the hatchet.  Oh yeah, and of course the most exciting part…..On Feb. 16th, I became an auntie!!! My sister in law gave birth to a beautiful baby boy- Daniel Aaron.  I am so proud to be an auntie, and with this little addition, I can say that I am more than happy to become closer friends with my sister in law.  So, in a few words, I can wrap up five months of life.  I still love my husband and will forever and a day, I still have hope for a better and more fulfilling future, and I do plan on owning a llama one day!  A nice llama!!!!!

Its been about 3+ months since my last blog.  I guess I should apologize for being MIA so long.  Life has been treating me alright, just trying to tread some water.  
Well, for those that didn’t know, my husband was out on “commission” for two months- basically, I was the only one bringing in a paycheck.  Finally frustrated with his boss’s crap, my hubby stormed out on “vacation” and never went back.  That started a fireball in our home.  For a brief second we actually knew where we were, and were ready to take life head on, horns high, and feet ready to smash anyone in our way.  Unfortunately, after the misshap, we were left with our pants down and staring blankly at the enemy.  No matter how much I fought for both us, I couldn’t win the battle.  With only one check coming in, our payments went flop yet again, and the phone calls started.  It was like a scratched, melted record that refused to stop playing.  The only positive out of those two months were Sheryl Crow/John Mayer tickets that had been purchased months in advance.  While I was in no mood to listen to people sing and spend money, I refused to give up the tickets, since those two just happen to be my most favoritest singers/song writers on this god given green lawn of mine. :)  So we went, and had a phenomenal time.  Not only was Sheryl Crow jamming on her guitar, and causing the crowd to go insane, but John Mayer looked absolutely, positively godly that night.  His long hair, gorgeous lips and hot bod just strummed that guitar like he was making love, and it was amazing!  I was mesmirized and will never forget that concert.  Believe me, when he comes back to NJ, I will be in the front row screaming my head off!  So, after the concert we went back to our not-so-happy lives and continued to breathe, slowly falling part, but holding on with the ends of our fingertips, hoping that God would throw atleast a string to help us up.  As month two rolled around, and the mortgage remained unpaid, I feared we would have to yet again, give it all up.  This time, I just couldn’t take it.  It was as if the walls were closing in on us, and there was no air to breathe.  And then, through the rubbles of our lives, through the dusty fog that had formed, a bright light shone through, and a phone call came in.  The most blessed moment- Jay got a job!  And not just any job, working for a top advertising firm in the city.  It has been 1 month since his new job, and we are finally pulling ourselves out of the rubble.  It has been a very tough ride, but I know this time, we will get out of it, I will be damned if that record plays again!  
So, appropriately, I changed my site to include the things which are closest to my present moment- John Mayer’s Waiting on the World to change, the Mana quote which I try to live by, and the background.  All on the hope that the worse is over, and our lives will change for the better.  
I am sorry to all my friends for not communicating with you throughout these last weeks, but when it gets tough, I store all my energy for the war, and this war was a hard one.  But I am back, and stepping up to the front again.  I love you all.  

Oh, and I am down eight pounds 4 ounces and counting!  

I haven’t blogged in a while, I guess I have just been too busy at work, and I don’t get much time at home before I knock out from the long day. 

The most exciting part of the week for me was yesterday, when I floated home, literally.  See, here we are sitting at work at quarter to five, and the rain is pouring down.  It had been pouring for a good 3 hours.  Thunder, lighting, the works.  As we left for the day, I wondered- how bad will the roads be.  Well, I turned the bend of my job, and looked ahead of me to see a small creek which had formed where the road used to be.  Panic stricken, I looked at my car, then at the water, prayed and slowly but carefully pushed my way through the creek.  There were Mac trucks on my right side and back, and they scared the shit out of me, as they plowed through, leaving my car to suck up all their water.  Well, we passed what I believed would be the worst of it, Boy was I wrong.  As we finished making the turn, I saw that no one else is moving.  At this point, it was about 5:45.  So I sat, on the only bit of dry land there was, and waited patiently, in hopes that maybe, it was just traffic that jammed up.  Finally realizing that something was terribly wrong I walked out of my car and looked ahead of me, only to find that a river had formed in front of us.  A river of more than 2 feet of water.  Now, I wa petrified.  My car cannot possibly pass that, I thought!  Let’s recap- I have a 2003 Toyota Matrix.  While it rides a little higher than a standard corolla, it most certainly is not an SUV or a truck.  I watch as the big Macs plummet into the water and swish their way to dry land-which technically isn’t too far from us, if you don’t count the river.  For those who live the Jersey area and travel to Jersey Gardens in Elizabeth, the road I speak of is McClellan St.-which is perpendicular to the road to Jersey Gardens and Ikea.  So we wait, and watch as a few brave souls in BMWs and Keas try to make it through.  Not knowing if they made it to the other side, or if they are sadly floating in our new lake. 

 After another hour, the traffic started moving again. I was confident that the worse may have passed, until I saw where the traffic was heading.  The cop was slowly directing us towards this river, forcing us to go through it, or spend the rest of the night on the only strip of dry road.  I felt my body trembling in fear now, my thoughts racing on the what ifs and the could bes.  I made the sign of the cross, as I started to work my way towards the river.  I saw two Mac trucks on my right side, who decided to cut me off while I try to tread, and a Ford Truck on my left with his high beams on coming towards me.  The only thing I could think was- Oh my god, I am going to buoy and flip.  Slowly I pressed on my accelerator, listening to the engine roar and feeling the vibration of those two trucks as they plummet through without any consideration of what could happen to me.  As I go through the river, I can see the water cover the hood of my car, and hear the swish of the water at my side doors.  I keep praying and singing “just keep swimming, just keep swimming” and I continued to press the accelerator.  It felt like an eternity, like I would never get out, and then, it was over, my car was back on dry land and I felt a tear drop on the side of my face.  For a moment, I heard cheering from the back seat, a sweet hurray, and then I moved on.  I looked around me to see about 15 cars that had not made it through the ordeal, and were sitting abandoned on the road side, waiting for help.  And one car that was floating, like the buoy I thought I would be, which we had to gear around in order to get out.  I smiled proudly and patted the dashboard on my vehicle, “Good nunuta,”  Nuna Uta is arabic for little kitten.  My little kitten had made it through another rough season of water and snow, and came up roaring in satisfaction.  I made it home at around 7:30- tired, wet and ready for bed.  Mother nature had tried to tackle me down, but I had surpassed the worst, and I was happy.